Thursday, February 23, 2012


My mind is doing a lot of wandering today. I'm not the least bit intoxicated, save for the bit of tobacco and nicotine I inhaled with Ce in the morning.
For the past 10 minutes I've been sitting outside of Solis Hall, I have observed that a crow's gait is similar to a that of a duck. It's a bit waddle-y, goofy and endearing. Unfortunately, due to their dark appearance and greater brain capacity (compared to ducks that quack) they have become an object of fear and misfortune. They're not so bad, really. I could say they're kind of pretty or handsome, even. If we'd just let them go about their business and cover our trash bins when we put them outside, they wouldn't have to be such a nuisance.

There's a part of me that regrets letting my anger subside so quickly to love and empathy. I have done this before, and in the past it was clearly a mistake. I've done it again, but this time I feel that I acted correctly. But I am left in anguish as my arguments seem to have little conviction if I remove my emotions entirely. This is obvious and so cliche to say, but it truly is difficult to be objective when you're wrapped up in it.
No one knows what this means but I don't care.

I would really like to finish writing my sociology paper today. It has been lingering on my weekly agendas for far too long.

Wishing everyone a productive afternoon.
Love, c.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012


I failed to mention it was my birthday a few days ago. I celebrated Thursday night all the way through Sunday afternoon. I am truly pooped.

Mimosi brunch.

Beautiful stack of bread, ready for cheeses.

Heads and bread crumbs.

V made fancy wines.
I have really great friends.

Happy Wednesday, world.
Love, c.

Onion peels.

I often mention to Ce that I really should have waited for love until I turned 25.
That was the original plan that I made when I was 12. I was a smart kid. But alas, charm and hormones have wooed me into what I now consider a serious relationship.
To wait would have been smart, because love is difficult. Sometimes I don't like the person I am in a relationship, namely the vulnerable, emotional girl that I had detested growing up. To let so many layers of the onion peel and let another person into my personal space is severely uncomfortable, and much of my time and focus is lost to such feelings. Sometimes I just think it sucks.
At the same time, it is a blessing to have a person that I admire share that space with me. I know that. This world is simultaneously beautiful and horrible, and to have someone ground you in happiness through life's ups and downs is something to appreciate. It makes me happy, and I honestly think the happiness factor outweighs the anxiety and tears that result from our sporadic struggles.
Being in love is growing together. Clearly, every person has a few things they must overcome, and if you can do that in the company of someone you trust, you are golden.

But sometimes I can't help but wonder if I should be spoiled by such company.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Thinking, thinking, thinking.

These are my current future plans, but more than half of it is open to changes.

1. Summer 2012 - internship/volunteer and take classes.
2. Spring 2013 - graduate.
3. Summer 2013 - internship in SD or SF.
4. Find a job, spend some time at home.
5. Travel.
6. Study journalism? Alternatively, nursing school in Oakland.

I really need to decide whether I want to minor in biology of Japanese studies. I have too many credits to squeeze in both, so I have to think about what direction I want to go regarding my future career. Are minors that relevant during a job hunt?
Becoming an adult is full of excitement and worry.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Every day.

I spent a lovely day with my friends half-watching the Super Bowl, picking at the pineapples on my Hawaiian pizza and indulging in some jell-o shots. I've never warmed up to jell-o shots. After chewing through the taste of vodka, I always long for a normal cube of jell-o to drop into a champagne flute.
Did anyone watch the half time show today? I loved seeing Cee Lo Green, completely dapper in his fully-sequined black robe. 

C: Cee Lo is so cuddly and so sparkly! Just the cutest.
N: Hahahaha yes. Like a star-studded blek bear.

Now that the day is almost over, it's finally time for me to put the finishing touches on this paper. Sunday procrastination is just the best (:

Also, this:

Please don't let the Monday Blues get you. I have certainly fallen victim to it on multiple occasions, but I feel like seeing this can change that.

Happy Sunday, everyone.
love, c.

Choo choo trinh.

This morning I woke up to the obnoxious chime of my cell phone alerting me that someone had sent me a text message.
It was 11 a.m.
Considering that I had stayed up until the wee hours of the morning after being heavily caffeinated on green tea the night before, that was the best I could do, really.
The content of the text was a pleasant surprise. A was dropping by to pay me a visit. I scrambled out of bed to put myself together and greet him at the door. Under the impression that I was still sick, he brought me a handful of chocolates, chewable vitamins, green tea latte mix and a pretty nug. After having a rough week, that was more than I could ever ask for.
A study session at his flat quickly ensued, where I was fed a tuna melt sandwich the size of my face with a hearty glass of orange juice, extra pulp. We shared some time out in the sun as we smoked a cigarette, and then played a quick game of wii Mario Kart before IZ whisked us away to grab some burritos as an early dinner.
Spending time with an old friend is always nice. But I cannot quite put into words the comfort and cozy I feel when I'm with my old housemates--A in particular. With him time passes calmly and with ease, and you truly believe everything will be okay in the end. I needed that.
So thank you darling, I had a lovely afternoon. You are one of the greatest friends I could ever ask for.

Hope everyone is spending a cozy weekend with their good friends.
love, c.

P.S. But I really do need to stop indulging in the cozy so often.
P.P.S. I saw my high school sweetheart, David Choi, in concert tonight (:

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Pick up, please.

My car was stolen. My beloved Maxi is most likely in Mexico right now getting its insides torn out and sold for dirty money. I'm not going to write anything self-righteous here. I've just been having a horrible week. Several hours after discovering that my car had been stolen, I myself felt like my insides were being torn out due to food poisoning at the dining hall. I've been stuck in bed with a fever for a few days.

A: Yeah. Shit happens.
C: Listen to a$$, it'll cheer you up!

It's quite a good song, but definitely a bit nauseous when sick.

Waiting for life to pick itself up. Hopefully before midterms week.
love, c.